An open Journal about pick up

Week of May 20th, 2007

Ok, so this week hasn’t been dynamite so far. I started off with a bang, going sarging on Monday because I couldn’t stop thinking about sarging.

That kind of enthusiasm is generally something good, I say to myself—but Loren and I were with a couple of other wings. I have a hard time winging other guys for the first time because I don’t know them at all, don’t know their habits, don’t know how to properly DHV them, etc. But, I realize its important to not always go out with the same guy every night (which I do). I’d actually rather sarge solo than go out with a different wing most nights (though I’ve never done an entire outing of solo sarging).

On the one hand, I’ve been going out and opening stuff consistently. Oh the other, I don’t feel like I’ve “nailed” anything in the last week. I guess what I mean by “nailed” is “run a set outside of what I would consider “par.”

I have pretty good success opening and hooking sets most of the time, but after that things get sloppy and I tend to just “flow” more.

I’ll call where I’m at right now the “pain period” that Swarzenegger talked about in his weightlifting book. I’m pushing through it, and I see big success on the other side.

In all honesty, I think these are the times when I am really growing and learning the most, because things aren’t happening on auto pilot, and I’m forced to really THINK about what I’m doing from set to set. Luckily, my opening body language is pretty solid, and my canned pieces are usually interesting enough to get me into a conversation with someone, and get them to reveal enough about themselves so I can bust on them and break into their world. Also, I haven’t been noticing shit tests of late, which I think means my frame isn’t taking them seriously. I kind of forgot they existed for a while.

All that said, I still find it tough to open sets early on in the night. Last night my first three sets were done solo (waiting for my wing to show up). First set I opened, then there was an interrupt JUST BEFORE hooking, and I flamed out. Right when I walked out I thought to myself “damn, I could have plowed through that so easy.” Really it seems there are only select few sets where I really have to WORK or get blown out. So I walked to a dark corner of the bar, took out my notepad and wrote down what happened. “Next time, PLOW!” So the next one, I got past the opener, hooked, and had just barely started normal conversation, before excusing myself from the set. What was the matter? Not really anything. The girl was on a faux-date with her male companion. I knew I EASILY could have taken his girl, but I stepped out anyway. Return of the moleskin notebook: “DHV story or game or something, PLOW!”

The third set was at another venue, I opened and won hooked the two girls though none of them were that cute, then to my surprise there was a very cute interrupt who I decided to choose as my target. “Who are you? Ooooh, so you’re THAT girl!” etc. I hooked her pretty easy, I noticed decent IOI’s, and told a couple of stories. She asked at one point “Are you a stand-up comedian or something?” Which I think is a sign that my routines are entertaining. I teased her a bit, told her what I really do and moved on with the conversation. Then, when we were at a high point and I noticed she looked over to find where her friends were at, I wandered off like a little bumblebee who just found another flower to pollenate. I wanted to try a takeaway, so I just opened a set of guys to show her I’m not needy. Later, my wing returned and I re-opened her with “where did you go?” knowing full well she was thinking that about me. “I was wondering the same thing about you!” We continued talking, teased her, I did some playful kino (something I noticed I was missing from this particular set when I did my takeaway), and continued to move forward. At some point I thought to myself “Oh I think it’s time for comfort.”

This is why my game is sloppy in places. I moved on to style’s EV routine, then she ran another type of personality test on me that was like the 4 questions personality test. It was good, worked on me like I was a chick. I # closed her and took off, though I couldn’t remember her name. I could feel that attraction had waned unexpectedly at the last minutes and knew my number would be a flake—although I decided to practice and get it anyway.

So now, I’m trying to focus on ATTRACTION.

Before I can pump attraction I’m going to have to practice DISQUALIFICATION. I.e., I need to be the guy who’s not there to hit on her.

Some disqualifiers off the top of my head:
1. neg
2. you’re just like my little sister!
3. We are NOT going to get along (we’re just too similar).
4. Note to self: do not date this girl.
5. I’m gonna hook you up. Which guy in here do you want me to introduce you to?
6. Too bad I’m gay or you’d so be mine.
7. I LOVE (redheads, Asian girls, short girls, etc.—something she isn’t)
8. Welcome to the ‘friend zone.’
9. You’re such a good friend!
10. let’s just be friends.
11. Don’t touch me, this shit ain’t for free!
12. Why are you so grabby? You’re like a hungry hungry hippo!
13. I’m toxic.
14. Run along now.
15. careful, I’m covered in broken glass. I’ll cut you!
16. I have a friend who you’d be PERFECT for.